The Democrat Debates Would Be 1000x Better With Andy Basiago

You may remember the story of Andy Basiago. I’ve written about him previously. He claims to have been a time traveler and space traveler at the age of 7 under DARPAs Project Pegasus. He runs for president every election–except this one.

He lost his eyesight. Here’s his gofundme page.

It’s tragic. It’s especially ironic it’s happening at the 2020 election, the year that you know will be full of vision puns. This goes double for Andy Basiago, because he talks about the chronovisor, a device that lets you see through time.

He claims to have used the chronovisor to see he will become either the president or vice president by 2028. His gofundme says he will run again in 2024 after his vision is restored “so that America can be placed again on the positive timeline.”

Now I want us all to imagine how much better the Democrat debates would be if Andy Basiago were there to tell everyone he gave advice to George Washington and witnessed Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address. Sure, he was only 7, but that’s more than any of the other candidates can say. They’ve certainly never met the founding fathers.

Imagine how he could discuss potential meetings with NASA and Elon Musk. He’d say to them, “You want to go to Mars? Cool, I’ve already been there.”

“You’re worried about healthcare? We have time travel! We literally have access to the entirety of time’s medical advancements. We can do anything.”

He would dominate. It almost makes me wonder if someone intentionally blinded him so he wouldn’t compete. Either way, I hope Andy Basiago reaches a speedy recovery so he can run again in the 2024 election.

Be sure to follow Timely Paradox on Facebook and for a lighter side of things, join the time travel meme group.